Pastor's blog

Prayer and Disappointed Expectations

Psa. 109:4 - For my love they are my adversaries: but I give myself unto prayer. (KJV)

There are Scriptures that teach us what we ought to do, and then there are Scriptures that teach us what we can do when what we have done hasn’t worked. Our devotional passage presents such a dilemma. On the one hand we encounter a gesture of love that is rebuffed. Instead of an action in kind, the giver suffers the humiliation of having strengthened rather than weakened the hand of his adversaries. There are times when our love provokes enmity. The rules of social engagement teach us to expect an in-kind response to an act of kindness. Love becomes a disarming tool, whereby one’s adversaries can be neutralized. Yet, there are occasions when showing love actually serves to harden rather than soften an adversary.

Loving the unloving can be emotionally draining. Many consider the emotional expense too great. Where love is continually given without an in-kind response, one is tempted to adopt the cynic’s view of life. The cynic’s philosophy is founded upon principles that take a dim view toward people. It celebrates the ungratefulness of people. It claims that the rewards of extending love are too meager for the risks involved. It denies the effectiveness of love as a transforming virtue. Having read the first phrase of this passage a cynic would respond with an, “Aha! I told you so. That love stuff doesn’t work!” Surely the force of logic appears to be on the side of the cynic when one encounters love that is so flagrantly mocked.

But, alas, we find a remedy in the second half of this verse. This short phrase answers the question, “To what do I give myself when giving myself to others hasn’t worked?” The answer is, “Give yourself to prayer.” Prayer is the most immediate remedy for unrequited love. Cynicism wastes no time in trying to set up shop within the emotions of one whose love has been spurned. Within us prayer and cynicism are seemingly in a contest of musical chairs to see which one will set the emotional agenda. Prayer will win out only in the hearts of those that give themselves to it.

In many cases we see prayer presented as a tool by which one is able to shape the world around him. Any activity that brings reproach upon the name of Christ is in danger of being deleted by the “effectual, fervent prayer of a righteous man” (James 5:16). Yet, in this passage we see the authority of prayer itself, namely in the fact that the offended one has in every sense surrendered himself to be examined in prayer. Having been humbled by his peers, he now humbles himself before his Lord. One might think he could do better giving himself to some hobby or busy-ness of mind that would relieve him of the sting of seeing scoffers ridicule his most selfless gestures. But being a man of substance, he chooses instead to explore the power of prayer’s ability to loose us from the shackles of disappointed expectations.